Sunday, February 19, 2012

Herman

I opened my refrigerator this morning and Herman, my Grandmother's sourdough starter, had a temper tantrum and erupted over the sides of his dough house (glass jar).  Luckily he maintained some self-control and did not explode all over the inside of the fridge, as he has done before.  He gets attached to some of his fridge neighbors and doesn't deal well when they get, well, eaten up.  Poor Herman is the only fridge resident that never moves on, and I think it gets to him every once in awhile.

Herman was gifted to my Grandmother back in 1982 from a friend of hers in Florida.  Grandma fed Herman weekly up until her death in 2005.  Then I became Herman's human.  It is a huge responsibility you know.  What if I forget to feed Herman and he, um, expires? Oh the guilt and shame I would feel!  I have grown very fond of Herman. I can see why Grandma took care of him for so very long.  He truly has personality, you can tell his moods by his consistency.  Some days he is very thick headed, others he is thin-doughed and you have to be careful about hurting his feelings.  Some days he sweats (even in the fridge!).  Then there are those days he blows his top (literally).  But all in all we have a good steady relationship, much better than I have with some humans in fact! 

Every once in awhile, if I don't create something with Herman, he gets fat and is too big for his dough-house.  Like now.  So I can either make some sourdough bread or coffeecake, or put him in a bigger dough-house and let him keep getting fat.   Now that would help keep ME from getting bigger.  OR........

I have spoken with Herman and asked if he would like to share himself with some of you.  At first he felt a bit torn apart (HA!) by the thought, but then said that it might be cool to see other refrigerators around the Great Lakes (he has only been to Bonita Springs Florida, Angola Indiana, and Lansing Michigan, and a brief trip to Montrose Michigan, but that part of him expired due to neglect...we won't get into that, the therapy bills were astronomical!).  Anyway, if you would like to have a cup of Herman to start your own Herman adventures, let me know and I will fatten him up before our next get together.  He comes complete with instructions from Grandma. You will need to bring a mason jar to take him home in.  Oh I am getting teary-eyed at the thought!

No comments:

Post a Comment